Do your Halloween treats pass parent inspection or end up in the trash?

This grandma is very careful about tossing questionable Halloween candy, as are most parents. Inspection of trick or treat bags often results in good money being thrown in the trash. Why not take the time to be sure the treats you give out this Halloween are a good investment? Safety is first on the priority list for parents when it comes to Halloween goodies. Here's how to insure your trick or treat offerings make the cut.

Think about your own kids when choosing Halloween treats to pass out.

Is this the type of treat you would feel safe giving them? If this treat was in your kids bag of goodies, would you let them keep it? If the answer is no, chances are this treat won't pass another parents inspection either. Quite often, parental instinct will give you the answer to this safety dilemma.

Offer entertainment instead of treats.

Trick or treaters might enjoy a free homemade haunted house tour or other activity. Set up a table with activities like painting miniature pumpkins or making masks. Feathers, fake jewels and mask forms are available at most craft stores. Use your imagination to come up with other Halloween themed activities for trick or treaters.

Give out small toys as a substitute for Halloween candy.

Think rubber snakes, flutes, whistles or other party favors. Be sure to give age appropriate toys to each child. Trick or treating toddlers or babies should never be given toys with potential choking safety hazards. Unsafe toys will never pass parent inspection. Try to choose quality inexpensive toys as treats.

It may be tempting to make delicious homemade goodies for Halloween.

This only works for kids of friends and relatives. Even then, Halloween treats should be labeled with your name, phone and address. Avoid giving homemade treats to kids you don't know. Homemade trick or treat items always end up failing parent inspection due to possible safety risks.

Gift certificates are a welcome treat.

Many fast food venues offer coupons for individual items. Passing safety inspection is not a concern with these trick or treat offerings. Parents can take their kids out for a free treat without concern. Kids love getting these treats because it gives them a second day of fun to experience.

If you do give candy, keep this in mind:

Parents look for things like wrappers that can be opened and re-wrapped. Another safety alert goes off when packaging appears tampered with or open. Small holes in packaging could be needle insertion or injection sites. Buy Halloween candy that is securely wrapped and difficult to tamper with.

Cut your entertainment budget without sacrificing fun

Family fun doesn't have to be expensive.

This Grandma knows how to have fun on a budget. Looking to cut costs without cutting the entertainment? Tired of budget scrimping and saving with no entertainment rewards? Want to find entertainment venues that save money and provide fun for the whole family? Here are some fabulous ways to cut your entertainment budget without sacrificing the fun.

Movies

*Next time you rent a Redbox movie, share it with friends, family and neighbors. Last one to watch returns it.
*Cancel the cable. Watch Netflix and Hulu through your X-box.
*You can also share your Netflix log-in with others. Split the meager cost and save a bundle on entertainment.
*Have a gathering and watch movies together. You can socialize and save money at the same time.
*Most movie theaters allow employees unlimited free movies during off peak times. Some even allow for one or two guest passes per visit.
*Rather than watching first run movies in theaters, wait for them to come to second run theaters or DVD. It's the same movie, no matter when you watch it.

Passes, memberships etc.

*Buying a State Parks pass cuts the entertainment budget. See some of the most beautiful areas of the state without paying admission fees every time you visit. Be sure to visit enough times a year that the cost is worthwhile. Camping, swimming and hiking are just a few of the offerings of state parks.
*Entertainment venues, restaurants, book stores and more, all give out free membership cards for discounts. Cut the budget by taking advantage of these free offers.
*Restaurants often have punch cards. Buy so many meals and get the next free. Is there a better budget cut than free?

Free days

Many cities offer a certain amount of free days per year at such entertainment venues as museums. Usually these require a state ID. Take advantage of these days to cut the entertainment budget. Arrive early. These free day events are often crowded.

Off peak rates

Travel during the week, rather than on the weekend. Rates are lower and the trip will be every bit as fun. Travel to warm weather countries or states in the winter. Reduced rates for off season travel cut the entertainment budget nearly in half. If you'd rather travel in season, purchase tickets well in advance.

Tents, campers, cars and cabins

Why pay for a hotel when camping is a fraction of the cost? Why fly when driving 4 people costs the same as flying one? Road trips are a blast! Plus, you see more sights on the way to your destination. If you like roughing it, go for economical tent camping. Try a camper or cabin if you prefer a little more comfort.

Bring back board games, jigsaw puzzles and other old time entertainment.

Many of the things our parents and grandparents did for entertainment were completely free. They were also tons of fun. So, why not turn off the phones and TV's for a while? Socialize with your family members and friends. Get to know them on a more personal level by playing games together. Who knows? You might get more than a night's entertainment out of this deal.

Breaking the chain

Some chains are made to be broken

Today, a lot of my various blog posts are about minding my own business. It's not a bad thing. It's about empowerment. It's a little about freedom. It's a lot about empowering and trusting others as well. But, back to that chain.

Since you last heard from me, my last grand-kid in residence moved out. Breaking the “under my roof” chain was not an easy choice, but it had to be done. Of course, I will miss her. Of course, there will be times when I wish she was back. But the bottom line is, I'm grandma, not mom and kids belong with their parents.

But wait, there's more.

I'm not just breaking the live in chain. I'm breaking the responsibility chain. Because not only do kids belong with their parents, so does the responsibility of raising them, no matter the circumstance. Barring abuse, neglect and other serious issues, that is.

My grand-kids will always be number one in my book. Same with my kids, of course. But here I am in my 50's. I find myself in a spot where my whole life has revolved around them. I suppose in some ways, that's as it should be.

But what about me? When will I be number one in my own life? Well, over the last few years, I have been making gradual changes toward that end. Because, let's face it, if you don't take care of yourself, what will you have to share or give to others? Not a darn thing.

I'm no good at selfish. That's not where I intend to take this. My grand-kids will also still get my advice and undivided attention when they need it.

So will you, by the way. This blog will now contain some of the best realistic parenting advice you'll ever get. Not because I'm especially intelligent but because I've been through a lot of crap and learned from it.

As for my kids and grand-kids, they will still be welcome and frequent visitors to my house. We'll laugh and play and go places together. We'll do all the fun things we always have. I love being a mom and a grandma. It's just that I don't want to be in that parenting role with them anymore. It's not my job.

The kids are too old and the grand-kids already have parents for that.

Plus, I've been wrong to take care of their responsibilities every time they have financial woes or struggles. It's not good for any of us.

Plus, I really should mind my own business.

Yes, I admit that I'm a bit of a know it all. Stop laughing, OK? I'm a huge know it all. Is that better? The difference is though, that now I'm trying. I'm really trying to break that chain. I hate when anyone tells me how to live. It's about time I realized that other people do too.

Meanwhile, you can still look to this blog for that parenting advice. And maybe a laugh or two along the way. I am hilarious, after all. You won't be able to help yourself.

Breaking the chain can be fun and I intend to prove it.

More adventures in Common Core math

Math should not cause a kid to look this depressed and frustrated!

Oh ya, we all have them, don't we? Those nights of bending over the elementary school math paper going, “Huh?” Good heavens, I was in Trig and Calculus in high school. It was easier than this “Common Core” crap. Who in the heck decided to bestow this gem on grade schoolers? Is there still a firing squad, because....

The kid is frustrated. I'm frustrated. My ever-supportive boyfriend is on the phone with an elementary school teacher trying to sort out the madness. All because they added money to the subtraction equation in my grand-daughter's homework assignment without explaining to her how to break down money when subtracting a larger cent portion from a smaller cent portion. What?

Why are we doing this to kids who understand fully the math concepts behind conventional subtraction? Why are we not just glad they have the mental capability to find the answer ONE way? That used to be a good thing.

My grand-daughter learned math the “old” way. She's good at it. She gets it. Now, she has to turn around and learn math all over again. Because the fact that she understands it the old way just isn't good enough any more. Not only that, I can't help her with her homework because I have no idea in hell what she's supposed to be doing.

Both my boyfriend and my grand-daughter spent time on the phone with a grade school teacher last night. They still didn't get it. Friends, if the teachers can't even explain it to the kids or the parents after a half hour phone conversation, who the hell can and why are we doing this?

I know. I know. Times are changing, right? But let's face it. Not every kid is destined to be a rocket scientist. They don't all need advanced math skills, especially at the elementary level. Surely, that can wait until they reach high school, can't it? Then, they can decide if their chosen career warrants it and go from there.

Oh, but that makes too much sense. Instead, let's confuse the hell out of kids, parents, grand-parents and everyone else involved until they all hate math so much that they never, ever want to use it again, even in real life.

Let's make it as complicated and frustrating as possible because that's how we make kids love math, right? WRONG!

Elementary school math should involve simple, basic concepts that are easily explained. It should give kids the basis for understanding the way numbers work. It should not be an exercise in hair tearing, gut wrenching exhaustion.

So, what happened? Well, what happened was that my grand-daughter went to school today with her math problem done one way and a note for the teacher to please sit down with her and explain how to do it the second way so that she can understand it.

Will that happen? Who knows? At this point, I'm not even sure the teacher gets it. Because if she did, you would think that by the time the kids got an assignment requiring them to use it, they would understand it. That's the point of teaching something, right? Making sure the kids understand it? Or at least it used to be.

Sigh....

5 Easy "tricks" that stop "bad" behavior quickly

Regular naps can squelch "bad" behavior.

Trying to stop bad behavior is like trying to stop a runaway train. If you put the brakes on too far down the line, that train runs right off the tracks. People get hurt. There are major clean up issues. Nobody reaches their destination. On the other hand, if you know a few ways to slow the train down without derailing it entirely, everyone has a smooth ride. Want to stop bad behavior in its tracks? Here's how.

Make your presence felt.

Get up close and personal with kids displaying bad behavior. It's pretty hard for kids to engage in bad behavior when a parent is standing right there. Sometimes all it takes to stop kids from behaving badly is for Mom or Dad to enter the room, sit beside them and read a book. Giving them a quick knowing glance adds to the effect.

Want to stop bad behavior? Take a knee.

Take discipline to another level. Looking down on your child illustrates the fact that you are somehow superior. Remember that boss who used to shake her finger at you? It's the same feeling. You don't want to belittle your child. You just want them to behave. So, sit down, kneel down or whatever it takes to put you on equal ground.

Choices are overrated when squelching bad behavior.

If you don't intend for your child to make a choice, don't give them one. Modern parents often make a big deal out of allowing children to make choices. That's all fine and good until you get to areas where no choice is the best choice. Let your children make small choices, such as what outfit to wear. Leave the big decisions to those who are best equipped to make them.

Make chores reflect interests.

A busy child is less likely to display bad behavior. More so if they're busy doing something they like. Each child has a hidden talent. It's your job to bring it out. Make it clear that they are your hero in that department. Make a point to thank them and praise their hard work. Bad behavior doesn't surface as often in kids with high self esteem.

Recognize the difference between fatigue and bad behavior.

Want to stop bad behavior in its tracks? Learn to recognize a tired child. In my opinion, much of what passes as bad behavior is simply hunger or fatigue. Today's kids are constantly on the go. They stay up later too. I know when my grand-kids get cranky, it's almost always because they're tired, hungry or have nothing to occupy their minds with. They're good kids and I bet yours are too. So, before you jump to conclusions, make sure there's not some other reason behind that cranky, belligerent attitude.

Portions of this post were previously published by this author on a now closed Yahoo property.

From 4 to 1

Where'd everybody go?

Here at Grandma's house, we're down to just one live in grand-kid. It's my youngest grand-daughter. When the other 3 kids found a temporary home with their dad, she didn't want to change schools again, so here she is with her own little room, spending her time drawing and painting with Grandma and otherwise just being her usual, sweet self.

Her room used to be the office, then it was home to 4 kids (or at least, sleeping quarters). So now, it seems pretty roomy with just one tiny little girl in it. And soooo quiet too. LOL From 4 to 1 is a huge difference, no matter which kid is hanging their hat here. They're all such great people. And I'm not just saying that because they're related to me.

OK, maybe a little.

Anyway, never fear, the other 3 of 4 grands will, of course, be spending time here, as always. Meanwhile, I'll be primarily writing about the adventures of me and the princess for a while. I'm sure she'll give me plenty to write about, all by herself. After all, she's no slacker. She just ran her 2^nd 5K!

Ya, my grand-kids are cool like that.

Buy kids clothes cheap - Keep them new

Know which stores have good deals (public domain photo)

Looking for a way to keep kids clothes looking new? Tired of replacing worn out clothes? Want to know where to find cheap new clothes? Keeping 4 grand-kids in clothes is a huge challenge. I help my daughter out by buying some occasionally. Yesterday, I talked about what good shoppers my teen grand-kids are. They come buy it naturally. If your clothing budget is stretched to the max, try these tips I use to save money and make their clothes last longer.

Belts for girls  
Tween and teen girls love belts. Nice ones can be pricey. Instead, buy a cheap scarf from the dollar store and a couple 3 inch metal rings from the craft store. Put one end of the scarf through both rings. Fold over and sew together to hold the rings in place. Fasten and tighten this cheap clothes accessory like a motorcycle helmet by putting the other end of the scarf through both rings, then back through one.

Lengthen the life of athletic shoes
Keep kids sports shoes new. Use spray acrylic on them right after purchase. Stains just wipe off. This tip keeps casual shoes free from water damage. It can be used on any cloth shoe. Those more expensive shoes they talked you into buying can be sprayed with water repellent.

Stain repellent  
Kids clothes get stained quickly. Not all those stains come out easily. Many people aren't aware that water repellent for clothes can also repel stains. Keep kids clothes looking new by using it regularly. Spray new clothes to keep them from staining. This will work through several washes. After that, just spray them again.

Buy in bulk with purpose
Certain kids clothes will always be cheap and in style. When you find sales on clothes that fit and look good buy several in different colors. Good examples are t-shirts and blue jeans. I got 4 pair of brand name jeans at a close out store the other day for 6.00 each. When you find good deals like this, stock up. Buy some clothes one size up if your kids like them. They'll grow into them. Socks and underclothes can be bought in bulk too. Kids go through them like crazy.

T-shirts

The craft store is a very cheap place to buy them. They're normally under 7.00 but go on sale every other month for half price. These are name brand high quality shirts. Craft stores buy them in large volumes at a discount. They pass the savings on to customers.

Portions of this article were published by this author on a closed Yahoo! property.